kokyreforest | Let's visit the LinLinBunny Cafe

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Let's visit the LinLinBunny Cafe

[ A news report just happens to catch Ivan's ears when mentions it the opening of a brand new cafe, the likes of which found its start in Japan. Ivan freezes in his tracks upon that magical word. A cafe started in Japan? He has to go there! He remains in the middle of the sidewalk and watches two reporters coo over petting rabbits as they also enjoy drinks and snacks. They look very happy.

Ivan quickly jots down the name of the place, and back at the training room, he does a search for the bunny cafe on his phone. Oh. It looks to be on the Silver Stage, a small distance away from most of the stations. That makes it a little harder to visit. ]

So, either a taxi for on foot... How much would a taxi even cost me...?

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[ At the comment about the rabbit liking to hide behind things, Barnaby forces himself to stifle his amusement. If only the attendants realised just how similar to Ivan that description actually was, he’d say that the bunny was perfectly suited to the young hero. But he can’t actually get away with saying something like that, not wanting to give the attendants any reason to be suspicious. He’s trying his best not to draw any additional attention to the two of them today.

For now, he seems surprisingly content with the bunnies that he’s managed to accumulate. Suddenly there are a lot of attendants focused around them, mostly taking a lot of pictures of them. Particularly of him, but for once he doesn’t seem to notice where the cameras are in relation to himself. He seems content to sit there, stroking the bunny in his lap. It seems to have fallen asleep already. Just like its namesake… ]

I believe we may well have to stay longer than the intended timeframe. What do the two of you think?

Sounds good to me!

[Pao-Lin hopes they won't get any calls from HeroTV today. She just wants to roll around on the floor with all the bunnies! Buuuut if she actually did that she might run the risk of squishing them, and that wouldn't be good at all. Pao-Lin contentedly scratches the head of a bunny clinging to her thigh.

"So, Mr. Barnaby," one of the employees says as she lowers her camera, "how's your motorcycle? I heard it broke down recently."

Ohhhhhhhhhhhh nutbunnies.]

[ What is that foreboding aura of doom filling the room? Ivan feels as if his heart stopped. He hardly notices that the nibbling bunny is once more attempting its climb to resume trying to snack on Ivan's hair. (Bunny stop that. You'll get sick.)

Why does that question sound so familiar? ]

M-Motorcycle? Broken?

[ His eyes go wide. As if in slow motion, Ivan turns his head towards Pao-Lin. They couldn't possibly mean... Did those three girls...? This was never supposed to get out for a million different reasons. Ivan's going to get into so much trouble. ]

[ Just what was this about? Barnaby turns to pin Ivan with an unsure look for a moment; his reaction tells him everything that he needs to know. Whatever happened isn't relevant at this point in time, but it will become so soon enough. Oh, will it.

He smiles at the employee with something of a strained expression. He has to take a moment to remind himself that this is for the greater good. ]

I managed to have it repaired without incident. Thank you for your concern.

[ Someone would have to try and piece Pao-Lin and Ivan back together after all of this was over, too. ]

[The employee claps her hands together in relief. "Oh, that's good! I bet it was a pain having to hitchhike on the highway like that. Hopefully you won't have to do it again." She laughs, and then adds conspiratorially: "So, you like Asian girls, huh?"

Forget death by bunnies. Ivan and Pao-Lin are going to suffer death by Bunny.]

Edited (because bad puns needed to be made) 2014-07-30 09:41 (UTC)

[ They are so dead. Ivan has gone a deathly shade of pale, almost like Judge Petrov. Yet for looking like he's about to pass out where he sits, Ivan becomes surprisingly and uncharacteristically loud. ]

I-I heard that-that one was just an impostor or a impersonator!

[ Like that one anthology comic. ]

I-I mean... d-doesn't Origami Cyclone seem like the type? A-All that Japanese culture... he-he-he's probably not even Japanese! An-an-and he shapeshifts!

[ Perfect plan. Let's drag Origami Cyclone through the mud filled with sharp rocks. He can survive his blog getting flamed by angry Barnaby fans for daring to just try to get him and Pao-Lin back home. He'll take one for the team, whichever "team" this is right now. ]

[

For the moment Barnaby is going to stay completely silent. Part of it is due to seeing if the other two could worm their way out of that one, and the other was due to not wanting to answer the employee's question. Usually he had a much easier time deflecting those kinds of questions... but right now, he didn't feel particularly inclined to.

Would this even get better? Or would it get so much worse first? ]

[Hey, kids, guess what time it is -- it's LinLin Comedy Hour! Don't touch that dial, we'll be right back with some ~hilarious~ hijinks!

"Huh?" one of the employees asked. "But Barnaby just said that his motorcycle really did break down..."]

Um, Origami probably just heard about it and used it as an excuse and stuff!

[Another one snickers. "Well, I guess Origami would be pathetic enough to impersonate a much better Hero than him." She rolls her eyes. "I don't know why he's so popular when his ranking is so low and he barely actually does anything Heroic."]

[ Someone give him that carrot that's meant for the bunnies. He's going to commit harakiri with it for his shameful actions. ]

Yeah... he's a complete loser... I mean, haha... I heard there wasn't even a motorcycle around... ha... ha... haaa...

[ This is the sound of his heart breaking de gozaru. ]

[ Now that is stepping over the line. Barnaby's expression fades into something less pleasant than it was earlier. Whether or not they're trying to cover their tracks, something just doesn't sit right with him. Especially coming from employees who are supposed to be his own "fans". ]

I would appreciate it if you didn't talk about my colleague that way.

[ Aimed at the employees, of course. ]

He too is a hardworking Hero. Perhaps I should take my business elsewhere if that's how you feel.

["A-ah, we're sorry, Barnaby!" an employee says. "We didn't mean..."

"Mikayla was just joking," adds another, sliding a "friendly" arm around the Origami smack-talker. "Isn't that right, Mikayla?"

Mikayla grumbles. "Yeah, sure." Clearly she's not as much of a fangirl as the other cafe workers. "Sorry, I guess." Soon after, she's quickly escorted away by her co-worker, ostensibly to get a quick lesson in How to Kiss Up to Celebrities.

"Well, anyway!" pipes up the worker who had initially greeted the trio at the door. "I hope all of you are enjoying the bunnies."

Said bunnies have been, of course, doing their own thing during the spectacle that had just unfolded. At present, one is pawing at Pao-Lin's stomach. (No, bunny, you cannot claw your way into the tiny god.)

"Can I get any of you something to eat or drink?" the worker continues.]

Oh! I'll have the bunny cake and iced tea!

[Yes. Let us all drown our awkwardness in food.]

Same here...

[ He doesn't even really hear what Pao-Lin ordered, but he doesn't really feel like trying to pick something out for himself. Ivan leans forward until he can bury his head on the table before him. The nibbling bunny manages to climb up Ivan and to the table to sit on his head. This rabbit...

"Uh oh... it looks like we have a secret Origami fan. I'm sorry about Mikayla." The worker pats Ivan's shoulder. "Don't worry. I'm sure your hero will be able to hit the mid-ranks someday." She'll then try to discourage the rabbit from sitting on Ivan's head while waiting for Barnaby's order. (Spoiler: the rabbit is already trying to make its way back to Ivan.) ]

[ Enjoying the bunnies? Yes. Enjoying the atmosphere? Not so much. Barnaby doesn't know how to respond at all to begin with, nevermind the fact that he's slowly beginning to get covered in bunnies too. They all seem to want to cuddle up to him, oblivious to the fact that he isn't responding very much at all. Bunny and bunnies, who would have thought? ]

That will be fine for me as well, please.

[ Might as well venture out of his comfort zone. Once the last employee is out of earshot, however, Barnaby turns on the younger Heroes. ]

You have thirty seconds to explain yourselves.

[Thirty years might not be enough to justify themselves for this.]

We're sorry, we're really sorry! It's just...we were stranded on the highway and trying to hitchhike, and...

[ Ivan barely manages to catch the rabbit on his head as he shifts to do a full dogeza. ]

It wasn't working, so I thought that maybe shapeshifting into someone else would work better, and it did, but we got scary fans of yours, and then we ran...!

[ The apology would probably work better if the bunny stopped trying to climb him. ]

Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! It's all my fault!

... Did you try to call someone for assistance? Why was that your first thought?

[ Guys, please. ]

We didn't have our phones or our PDAs with us...I think the same NEXT power that stranded us also took those from us. [Damn plot hole NEXT!

But she realizes, belatedly, that maybe instead of hitchhiking, they could have just asked to borrow someone's phone. Oops.]

[ And there was the fact that they feared Natasha would kill them upon finding out. ~~And before the Beginning showed that everyone had a transporter~~ ]

No one would even stop to let us ask to use their phone... And there probably wouldn't have been any signal as far out as we were...

[ They've mentioned the crazy fans and running away... they have yet to mention how they got back to Stern Bild... ]

What NEXT power?

[ Why is Barnaby only ending up with more questions than answers? This is going to take longer than he had anticipated. Forget about thirty seconds. ]

[A dejected shrug.]

We don't know. The only way we knew it was a NEXT power was because there was a flash of blue light, and then suddenly we were on the highway. I mean, I guess it was probably teleportation or something, but I don't know why we ended up losing our phones and stuff too...

And whatever the power was, it was strong enough to take us out of Stern Bild completely. I don't even think Robin Baxter could do a switch like that.

[ Not that there is much similarity beyond teleportation...

Also, Ivan is still doing dogeza, now with the bunny on his head. ]

[ It becomes very clear then that Barnaby's priorities have shifted when he hears about the incident even further. ]

I'm simply glad that the two of you are unharmed. It could have been a lot worse. However, next time I would appreciate knowing of the incident. I don't mind you doing whatever is necessary to make it out, but I do still have to deal with the press.

[ He'd rather deal with a small scale gossip issue than not knowing what to say in front of a fan. ]

We meant to tell you eventually! ...really.

[She does mean it, although certainly her tone sounds less than convincing.]

[ Is he going to be able to survive this? Is he also going to be able to escape Unfortunate and Incorrect Implications on the other part of that story? ]

It won't happen again! We're really sorry!

[ It bears repeating again, and Ivan puts a hand on top of the bunny on his head. If it's going to be there, it is also doing a dogeza. ]

[ That poor bunny. This poor Bunny. Barnaby is at least going to save the one currently perched precariously on top of Ivan's head before it meets a fate worse than death. ]

Is that so. How long ago was this?

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